Life Skills Education and Counseling - Bukhana - bukhana_primary_school - Luuka

Visit by Lorna Katagara on 2019-07-03

Report ID
5852
Created by
Lorna Katagara
Created date
2019-07-04 09:43:24 UTC
Modified by
Lorna Katagara
Modified date
2019-07-04 12:40:51 UTC
Trip Time
10:10-17:00 (6 h 50 m)
Village Time
12:00-14:50 (2 h 50 m)
Travel Time
4 h 0 m

Life Skills Education and Counseling community lesson

School
bukhana_primary_school 
Lesson Taught
Relationship Skills: Love 
Girls Attended
0 
Boys Attended
0 
Total Student Attendance
0 
Teachers Attended
1 
Fathers Attended
10 
Mothers Attended
18 
Total Parent Attendance
28 
Staff Attendees
Lorna Katagara 
Government Attendees
LC1,VHT 
School Staff Attendees
Life Skills Teacher 
Visitor Attendees
None 
Total Attendance
0 
Learning Objectives
To identify the challenges affecting the relationships in families and how they can be addressed. To create an atmosphere where people are free to speak out the issues that are affecting them in their relationships ; at home,community
Notes
Introduction Lorna went to this village to continue with Relationship Skills focus in on Love and healthy relationships in our homes with our spouses ,children and community at large. Healthy relationships are important for anything to thrive and also without Love the relationship is bound to fail hence the importance of this lesson. Overview Today the meeting place was different from the previous one as the meeting was brought closer to the trading center. The chairman Ngobi directed Lorna to the meeting place and he requested Lorna to allow him return the motorcycle he was using and thereafter join them in the meeting. After about 13 people had gathered, the vice chairman opened the meeting with a word of prayer and the meeting begun. The chairman joined in shortly after and reintroduced Lorna to them and what the Life Skills Program was all about. He brought them up to speed previously on what was discussed about in the previous meeting. He told them we discussed about the relationships in our families and what some of the issues affecting the families were. After this he invited Lorna to take over from there. The last meeting more men participated than the women and they aired out their challenges how the women are pushing them away from their homes forcing them to leave and marry another wife whom he is at peace with. They said that the “so called Gender Equality”, is destroying their homes whereby You cannot tell a woman to do anything without her asking him if he cannot do it. They mentioned that the women were keeping their children away from them telling them that they are irresponsible incapable of taking care of their family making the children to disrespect them. They mentioned that when they come back home tired and hungry from a hard days work, their wives don’t want to serve them as they tell them to go back where they came from, they ask them whether they did not eat where they were and they said that with such an environment, they are forced to seek solace else where. They go ahead and tell them to go back where they came from and marry those ones if they want. The women compete with them to run the home. One man said why wouldn’t he marry someone else who gives him the respect he deserves. Another man said that the women are dirty and don’t want to be told , some don’t know how to cook and when you mention that to them, they tell you to cook it themselves. Lorna therefore asked to hear from the women since the last time the men did most of the talking. Looking at the women’s faces, they seemed very frustrated with their husbands as one of them said “Musomesa” meaning teacher “those men you see there, have abandoned their responsibilities. She said how does a man wake up in the morning leave no food at home, go to the trading center play games and come back home asking for food she asked is it right for her to really give him food? Where would she have got it from. Another challenge is men are lazy they don’t want to work. They mentioned that they also return back home very late and don’t want to be asked where they are coming from. The men responded and said they are coming from work which sent the women chanting what kind of work makes one come back that late and yet they are married men. The meeting was wild with both men and women complaining about each other. Lorna interrupted and told the meeting that in a marriage there are two parties involved. Sometimes men or even women forget that now they are married they enter into marriage and still leave like they are not married. They want to do things like they used to do before which brings issues in the home. Lorna also reminded them that there was a reason why God created Man and then woman and not man and man or woman and woman and the reason was for the woman to be a helper and support the man. He put man as the head of the home and not woman. It is therefore a mans duty and responsibility to provide, protect , serve his family and not vice versa. She said that women cannot be the head of the house and that marriage is not a power thing of who does this or that. Such a relationship cannot thrive. Lorna mentioned that very soon in Uganda if we don’t curb this problem, there going to be many single mothers why? Because the women are driving men away because they want to be independent and don’t need the man which is okay to be independent but not at the expense of another. Lorna told the women that men demand three things Honor,respect and love but cautioned the men that they do not deserve this if they are not playing their husband, fatherly duties. Lorna advised the men to also give more time to their family than they spend outside. She also told the men that the woman need more things ; love,care,provision,protection among others. One woman asked Lorna who is supposed to greet the other in the morning? Men said the women while women said men. Lorna said this should not be an issue as there is really no order as it’s okay for either parties to say good morning. Conclusion The meeting was cut short as some community members were going for burial while others at the sub county for a meeting. They will continue from here next time. 
Next Visit
2019-07-19 - Purpose: Continue with Love and having good relationships at home, community and children where everyone is happy ,free to speak out , is heard and does not feel left out.
Program Success
Openness of the community to air out their problems/challenges.
Program Critical Needs
Relationship Skills
Program Ownership
Community participation and attendence
Other Program Observations
The trees are doing well and so are the goats as relates to Mvule program.
Program Expected Of Village
Mobilize each other to attend in bigger numbers.
Program Staff Preparations Next Visit
Call the chairman reminding him of the next set date when to meet and also prepare for the lesson to teach on that day.
 

Report Photos

7721 Lorna was telling the community members that we do not need to make small things that can be resolved immediately turn out into something big that will be difficult to resolve later.
7724 This man is on the LC committee he was requesting Lorna to please talk to the women on their behalf as for them the men ,whatever they say to their wives they will ask them whether they can’t do it themselves. He was therefore saying Gender equality is what will break their homes as it is what the women are using to defend themselves as they don’t want to be told.